7 Things You Can Only Get Away With At The Gym
Some people go to the gym, willingly, to merely get in shape. Some go because they’re addicted to looking at their veins pulsate and their muscles pop like bodybuilders. Others are forced, either by doctors, their own self-loathsome feelings, or even by the pressures of the entertainment industry.
No matter what category you might fall into it’s inevitable that should you gather up the energy to transition from your couch to a gym you’ll see all forms of these people carrying themselves around with looks of determination, exhaustion or occasionally apathy. But that’s not all you’ll see.
The gym is a unique place indeed. In fact, there are some things that one can get away only at the gym.
Sweating on everything
Yes, it’s inevitable that at the gym you’ll sweat a bead or two. And generally the rule is you carry a towel to wipe down the machines after use, but of course, not everyone follows that rule. There’s nothing worse than sitting on, laying on or grabbing a machine that’s drenched in someone else’s perspiration. But hey, it’s the gym so it’s okay.
Walking around naked in public
Walking through the doorway of the men’s locker room at a gym is like entering a dirtier, steamier, smellier, more old-naked-man-filled version of Narnia. Never before have we seen so many older, heavier, out-of-shape naked men just sitting or standing around having conversations while naked. For us clothed occupants it’s awkward. But again, it’s the gym, so what can you do?
Granted, after working out a hard set it’s more difficult to catch your breath. But at the gym there are certain types of guys who go well over board into the realm of heavy panting. Acting as if no one else is around these guys have no qualms about whatever awkwardly sounding pant comes from their mouths, as long as they have enough air in their lungs to push out another set of ten.
Male workout clothing
From 80’s styled retro workout pants to tiny, spaghetti strapped tank tops, guys tend to wear the strangest attire at the gym in order to get their bodies into shape. Oh, and we can’t forget the backwards or sideways hat—because you need to catch that sweat, and you need to look cool at the same time. Right guys?
The funny thing about workout clothes is that if men were to wear what they wore to the gym out in public they are seen as lazy, as people who don’t care what they look like. However, if women go out in what they work out in, say very tight yoga pants and tiny sports bras, it’s just sexy. Well, we can’t argue with that.
Grunting in public
If panting at the gym isn’t awkward enough, grunting steps in. There are times when the bodybuilder types must get that last bench press in. In order to do so they have no problem screaming bloody murder at the top of their lungs, despite interrupting the rest of the gym. “Oh no! Was somebody just murdered?” No don’t worry, that guy in the corner was just trying to get in one last push. “Oh, that’s stupid.” Yes, we know.
The water jug
Only in the gym is it acceptable for people—mainly guys—to carry around giant water jugs to use as water bottles. But hey, if you’re working hard enough on creating your own ‘situation’ down beneath your shirt our guess is you might just need that much water. Then after you’re finished you can head into the locker room, put some HGH powder in that sucker and call it a milkshake… a steroid-filled gallon sized milkshake.
The workout face
You know the face. It’s that one guys make when they’re trying to show others how hard they’re working. The face turns red, the veins start to pop and the eyes begin to bulge. Then they drop the weights, never placing them down neatly. ‘Come on, you expect me to be neat about working out? I’m trying to lift over here!’ Then comes another face, the one of acceptance as they look at themselves in the mirror, nonchalantly curl their arm so that they might see their bicep and slowly glance around to see if any girls are watching. Well, no buddy. None are. Now put the dumbbell away you jerk.